


Reflections

by enmudecer



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Married Couple, Other, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:34:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24745426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enmudecer/pseuds/enmudecer
Summary: It couldn’t be; she was dead. But, maybe it could by some miracle. After all, he thought his father had been until Vader's revelation. A million questions rushed through his mind. Without thinking he was suddenly in front of the loving couple. Mara still by his side. Only when he was face to face to women that had to be his mom did he realize his miscalculation.
Relationships: Mara Jade/Luke Skywalker, mention of other background relationships
Kudos: 13





	Reflections

The Lothal tram whirred past the never-ending green landscape. Luke sighed looking at the scenery, he never imagined there was so much green in the galaxy as a boy on Tatooine. It had been eleven years since he had left the old dustball of a planet. At times he missed it, the nostalgia for the uncomplicated problems of his youth. 

At his side, his wife, Mara, squeezed his hand in comfort. He turned from the window and smiled at her. The tram was filled with important delegates of whatever worlds were deemed vital to the New Republic nowadays. Plus Mara and Luke, they were here as Jedi masters to look over the Annual Conference of Peaceful Worlds. It was more of a show, nothing really got done at this meeting just a lot of back petting and cruder phrases Mara used. 

At remembering Mara’s choice words she shared with him that morning as they lay in bed in marital bliss, brought a bigger smile to his visage. Luke, without caring for decorum placed a small chaste kiss on the lips of his wife. Mara pulled away gently pressing her hand to his shoulder. Her eyes reflected pools of love. 

“Watch the bump you weirdo,” she laughed softly and kissed his lips quickly once more. He raised his eyebrow playfully at her. 

“Here I thought you were going to nag me about the kiss,” he placed his hands on the large swell. Only a couple of weeks left until their son was to be born. Mara should be on maternity leave from Jedi duty, but Luke had given up early on the fight of stopping her no matter her state. He even offered not to come to this pointless thing, but she shook her head no. It was an errand and an easy one both of them had no reason not to go. “I think the pregnancy’s made you a romantic sap.”

He touched his forehead to hers noses brushing smiling down at her. She smiled back sweetly. 

“No, actually, you’d think the bump would be a turnoff. Yet, here I am still fielding unwanted attention. I’m hoping this will discourage that more.” She peppered another kiss to his full lips. He withdrew laughing. His arms wrapped around her keeping her to him. Despite the stuffy conference he was happy, it was a calm type of quiet and he basked in it. For years he thought he’d never have this. All he wanted after the Rebellion was true love, to get married, settle down, have a family. He loved the action and adventure, exploring the galaxy. But, after he lost his home on Tatooine he knew now how precious home and family were. And he wanted more than ever to rebuild his. 

And now he would, though at times his heart felt so heavy. With finding out about his birth family of his father and Leia, he had set out to find more on his birth mother. His aunt and uncle had told him they weren’t sure who his mother was. As he grew as a teen he thought that meant that they just wanted to spare him the truth that his mother was probably a sex worker his father had knocked up while he traveled the galaxy and he just dumped Luke with the closest relatives because he couldn’t be bothered. 

Now he knew that wasn’t the truth at all. Maybe, they really didn’t know who his mother was at all. Maybe they were told and thy didn’t believe it, Uncle Owen, in particular, was always pragmatic. Or maybe they knew and didn’t tell him because they knew he’d run off in search of the little remaining relatives he did have.

His mother was a child queen who was beloved for her kind heart and wit, her cool head while in danger but also her humbleness to ask for help. When she grew up she became a force in the senate one of the few officials along with Bail and others started the Delegation of Two-thousand, which was the first moment of the Rebellion. She was the mother of the Rebellion and the mother of twins that would finish what she started.

He really wished she was here to see how much Leia and he tried so hard to follow her example. He always wanted to be like his father and he was, but he wished he stood as regale as she did. His mother left bigger shoes to fill than his father. It seemed almost easy to be a good Jedi compared to the countless social good she did. It was easy to win fights it was harder to sway hearts and minds. 

Mara grabbed his hands “Hey Flyboy come to land from up in the clouds for a minute.”

Luke looked at her and smiled bashfully at his wife, he loved that word now more than ever. She always knew when he had wrapped himself too much in his own thoughts. “Yes _dear._ ” he grinned at her unashamedly though she squeezed his hands harder for the trespass. Mara loved to give him nicknames but she hated overly lovesick ones. Claiming they were overused and sickenly romantic. To which he replied that’s why they’re so great. He never wanted to lose that initial spark he had with her. To which Mara responded with some form of threat to his life for old time’s sake.

“Don’t be obvious but at your 3 ‘o’clock look at the couple.” She whispered, a cold feeling traveled up his body, she was suddenly the same type of serious she got on missions. Sadly, obvious was his style and he turned to check without even trying to hide it. 

He gasped, it couldn’t be. 

A petite woman with white streaks in brown hair. Whose face had laughter lines and crows feet had her arm wrapped around the senator of Pantora, a blue-skinned lady who looked the same age. 

It couldn’t be; she was dead. But, maybe it could by some miracle. After all, he thought his father had been until Vader's revelation. A million questions rushed through his mind. Without thinking he was suddenly in front of the loving couple. Mara still by his side. 

Only when he was face to face to women that had to be his mom did he realize his miscalculation. She looked exactly like the holos Leia had found. He didn’t realize this might have been a bad idea until he was finally face to face. However this played out they now had an audience to their family drama. Maybe, he should have stayed away she clearly had. He struggled against the hurt feelings coming up and strangling his windpipes.

Luckily, Mara saved them once more. 

“Hello, we’re the Jedi Master’s assigned to speak at the opening ceremonies. I’m Mara Jade-Skywalker and this is my husband Luke Skywalker. I saw your earrings from across the tram and my husband being the dear he is-” she squeezed his arm hard “dragged me over to find out where you got them. Don’t be fooled by this traditional Jedi clothing but sometimes a lady just needs to accessories!” 

Before the women had time to respond to Mara’s clear lie. Luke blurted out

“I thought you were dead!” Oh, Mara was really going out of her way to cover for his floundering and he really thwarted her best efforts. She had to resist the urge to facepalm or roll her eyes. That was below the Jedi Master she was. For her credit the older woman simply smiled at him and asked her lover, maybe wife to fetch her a drink. 

“I think you may have me confused with Senator Amidala,” she looked at Luke with sad eyes, a look of a woman staring at a ghost just as Luke was staring at a ghost “You see my name is Sabe and in my youth, I was her Handmaid and decoy when she needed to be in two places at once.” 

Luke deflated and relaxed against her hand. A simple “Oh.” fell from his lips. 

“I would have loved to have contacted you. I was very close to your mother. Sadly, I could never work up the courage to.” She smiled at him, it was forced and pain clearly showed through. Mara analyzed her closely like she would have any mark while she was a Hand. 

She got the feeling the relationship was more than she lead on. Possibly romantic, possibly one-sided. It would make sense why such a _close friend_ would stay away. 

It was information she would file away for possibly useful for a later time. In the meantime Mara’s priority was Luke. She laced their fingers together and squeezed slightly. He was a good man and he deserved the galaxy. He deserves so much she can not give him. 

Kriff, even just giving him an heir was hard enough work. And she knew deep down all he longed for now was a home full of kids. For a long time, she detested that very thought. Not because she hated kids, she actually loved them, if anyone saw her with the Organa-Solo children they knew just how much she loved being an auntie. But, the issue was her, she hated the thought of a child having to suffer her being their mom. A woman who was just learning what a real family was, hell what loving someone in a healthy manner was.

And then she fell ill and everyone including her thought she was going to die. It clawed at her that she would have left Luke with a broken heart and nothing to take comfort in. No child that he could hug and remember her by. She would have died with not having left the family she wanted to build with Luke. 

She wanted a family with him, the family she never had. It was just so hard for her to allow herself to open herself up to the potential heartbreak. But, life was too short and she was stronger than ever. They’d build their family, and if one child was too much for her body they’d simply adopt the rest of them. Honestly, even if she could birth more they’d still adopt in all probability. No one could be strong enough to birth all the children Luke wanted. 

Mara had to smile at the thought that her idea of a big family was maybe three kids but Luke started with his heart set on an even dozen. Since he was no longer on Tatooine where having only one child was hard enough he truly went overboard on his desires. They’d negotiated for the time being five and only after seeing how the first goes. 

Luke and the women, Sabe had slipped into basic pleasantries as Mara drifted off to the future. She’d been doing that, Leia called it Mom-brain. The hand that wasn’t holding Luke’s hand and stroking it with her thumb, settled onto the protruding stomach. In a couple of weeks their family would grow. 

“Congratulations by the way,” Sabe tilted her chin the Mara “Your mother would have been so happy. You know she always wanted a big family. She wanted nothing more to be a full-time mother on Naboo.” she smiled wistfully at the past. 

“No way! That woman clearly loved her job she worked so hard.” Luke blinked back surprised as Sabe shook her head. 

“She loved the citizens on the galaxy not the job. The job was her way of showing her love. But it wasn’t her ambition in life. No, in fact, she had plans to retire from politics completely after her term as Queen. But, in life seldom does anything go as planned.” Luke stared ogling at the woman who was a key to his long-dead mother. He had met the last of her- their living relatives, but he got the sense that like with his aunt and uncle they loved each other but they weren’t the closest. Like if he had asked what her favorite color was they’d give the answer to the color she loved the most as a child, not the one she liked as an adult. It was what it was. 

He was close to them, not as one would be if he had actually grown up around them. But, as close as long lost relatives could be. He knew one of his mom’s nieces was a senator and got along fantastically with Leia, taking his sister under her wings. The other tragically died, she had become a rebel organizer during the reign of the Empire. She was caught and executed. The family name was almost tarnished. But, that didn’t matter to them. What mattered most is the had lost another loved one to tragedy. His grandparents had passed by the time he found the Naberrie family. Those that remained were hit mother’s sister, her being his aunt and her husband, his uncle, and their children. 

It was strange to have another pair of aunt and uncle and not have been raised by them. He assumed they acted how an aunt and uncle who didn’t need to also raise their nephew acted like. They invited him for birthday’s and holiday’s told him stories of his mother as a child. 

He had always had the missing piece of her in adulthood. After all that was the version of her that sired them, that birthed them, that would have raised them if it weren’t for her untimely death. That was another mystery he’d yet to solve, maybe Sabe could help him, maybe she knew or even knew where to start.

The internal chime of the tram dinged a nice little melody and a droid voice came over the speaker announcing their arrival. Suddenly the crowd began to move once more and Luke was filled with urgency. 

“Will you keep in touch. Please, I want to know more about Pa-my mother.” Luke’s eyes filled with hope as he stared at Sabe. The woman held his gaze and nodded in agreement. 

“My wife’s secretary will be in contact with your protocol droid to arrange a meeting.” with that final word Sabe merged with the crowd trying to find the senator that was her wife. Mara looked on to the exchange with great interest. Interesting that she knew about 3P0 serving as both Senator Organa and Luke’s protocol droid for the assembly. It means she must have been well aware of who they were, possibly for some time now.

She held Luke back until the tram almost completely cleared out she wanted to mention everything she had just observed. 

* * *

Mara readjusted herself on the plush living room chair. She was overly swollen at this point, her feet and ankles puffed despite not having done anything physically exerting besides existing. It was too hard to stay sitting in any one position and sleeping was a nightmare. The only reason she got any was that Luke would soothe her through the force calm the baby down or help it readjust in the womb so he wasn’t laying completely on her bladder. But, they were in the presence of another couple now and that type of action seemed too intimate to do in front of anyone. 

Sabe and her wife had invited them over for tea Mara being pregnant had to abstain from anything with caff, and it was slowly killing her, instead she sipped at a tall glass of thick green juice. It was a Lothal special that they made for pregnant women it was supposed to be a miracle or something for the baby’s health. Her hand wrapped the cup loosely and the other rested idly on the peak of her belly as she followed the conversation. She wondered how odd it would be to go back to her previous body shape and not have the bump to cradle, a small ping of melancholy passed through her only fleetly. After all she wouldn’t have the belly but she’d have the baby to cradle instead. 

The conversation was really just small talk, Sabe asked questions of the couple how they met, Mara smiled throughout the story always loving how Luke told it. Like he knew he’d marry her one day despite her having a blaster to his head the whole time. Maybe he did, the force worked mysteriously like that. Or maybe, and the most likely reason was, he was a sappy romantic who looked at her and decided he would pour love onto her until she broke. 

Soon though it was time for Luke to ask his burning questions and at the mention of his mother Sabe’s wife politely excused herself feigning having summit work today. A lie sang the force but she didn’t need that warning, the assembly was just an over-glorified work retreat for the politically elite her and Luke were forced here to pretend otherwise. Sabe seemed to catch Mara’s looks and looked down at her teacup before casually saying. 

“Ah, you must know how it goes though. It’s always awkward for your love to talk about their past partners.” Mara had to stop herself from preening at the fact that she had calculated correctly. She only stopped because Luke shot her a look that simply said _Callista_. It wasn’t accusatory but stated as a fact and observation that they two may have gone through the same tense situation as his parents and Sabe. 

Mara leaned forward in interest. She didn’t want it for the gossip that the dearly remembered Senator Amidala clearly had had more than one triste but in the interest of the love stories that must have unfolded for her husband to be with her today. Sabe smiled into her teacup as she took a sip.

“It was long ago we were really children just playing at love. Passions soon stilled and it became one-sided on my part. Padme had moved on with your father though we remained friends. I tried to, but alas I found it hard.” she took a sip once more of her tea weighing her words “It is difficult to allow feelings to cool when you’re working so closely with someone. Time and distance heals all things.” Mournfully she looked down her thumb stroking her teacup “I wish what had occurred hadn’t been the first step of healing for me. I’m so sorry Luke.” 

Sabe placed the cup down and gently rested her hand on Luke. In another life Mara would have glared vibroblades at anyone who touched Luke in such a familiar manner. But, they both have grown since those chaotic early days. Mara reached out to Luke within their bond to send reassurance to him. Sabe’s words brought great comfort for him in the Callista aspect. She was glad. They both needed to heal a lot more and any step they took was progress. 

Everything surrounding that era of their relationship had been a disaster and they had hurt each other greatly in that time. Sabe had said it well time and distance but it all depended on how that was reached. Mara had pulled out abruptly from Luke’s life with no closure with each other. Callista also departed the same way. Luke had moved on and had hoped pretending like it was business, as usual, would keep Mara pacified. But, she was hurt. That Luke the man that had always been trying to pry her heart open had moved on. At the same time, it was selfish of her to expect him to always be there even when she worked so hard to push him away. 

“I’m sorry if any of this brings up old feelings.” Luke looked down, he was always so wary of stepping on others even when the result would be his way.

“No, it might hurt but that doesn’t mean this isn’t joyous. I loved your mother enough to support her in anything even if it meant her path would grow further away from me.” Sabe sat back once more and picked up her cup of tea.

“If you don’t mind do you think you could tell me more about my parent’s relationship? You seem to have been her confidant and there’s sadly no trace of it.” Sabe flashed him a smile. 

“Ah, yes you’ll find that the reason it’s like that-” she leaned forward like she was to whisper a secret “on purpose. It was because their marriage was a secret. Jedi could not hold attachments, including marriage. And Padme was under duty not to bring shame to Naboo and the whole affair would have. Imagine the Slodge News ‘Nubian Senator Seduces Hero with No Fear Away from the Republic at this Dire Time.’” 

Luke sat back in shocked and looked at Mara with wide eyes. “Interesting, in our research of sacred Jedi texts, from thousands of years old we never encountered anything prohibiting outright matrimony,” Mara spoke up as she knew Luke was digesting Sabe’s confession. “They forbid possession clearly. I assume maybe along with thousand of years they conflated marriage as a path to physical possession. Maybe, through martial rights, like in the case of a spouse owns land if they die the surviving spouse is the new owner. Or maybe they feared they’d grow possessive of their spouse.” Mara shrugged taking a sip of her beverage. “Whatever the Republics Order was we’re not out to follow their footsteps. We can look at what they did and follow some of the original traditions, but after all that version did fall and Palpatine merely nudged it along the way. He exploited their own faults against them so we must learn from those mistakes and try to rebirth the Jedi into a new era.” She smiled at Sabe. Mara’s given that same speech countless of times by now, to knew students, to sludge reporters picking at Luke for not being the traditional Jedi Master. 

“I think you’ll both do a wonderful job. The Jedi were doing the best that they could but it wasn’t enough. In the end, they unintentionally began to hurt their very own. I saw how your father slowly began to be crushed under the burden of responsibilities. Your mother tried to alleviate his burdens but she was being ever more taken away by senate business. Please the two of just always remember what is most important to the both of you. Life often gets complicated but love shouldn’t be.” Sabe looked at them like she was looking at ghosts from the past. 

“I think love is very complicated. We can love each other and have obstacles in our way, be in love but not have been ready to accept it, or love each other knowing that we weren’t the right version of ourselves for each other. Either way, I do think it’s complicated but how we choose to answer the puzzle doesn’t have to be.” Mara glanced at Luke as she spoke, all of this was shared experience between the two. Luke nodded in agreement. Sabe smiled wistfully. 

“Tell me what’s the simple answer to those difficult trials,” Sabe asked encouraging them. Sabe though their senior by many years she was actually a newlywed. Finding love, after all, didn’t have a set age. Although she disliked it had taken many years for her to heal the hurt of Padme’s tragic death. 

“As horribly corny that it sounds it’s communication, listening, self-awareness, and patience,” Mara stated Luke entwined his hand with the hand that she had rested on her pregnant belly smiling the special smile that felt like the sun was beating down on her. He leaned over from his plush chair and kissed her softly on the lips. The world paused a moment as she responded. Normally, Mara hated displays of affection if she initiated the action it only meant that she had been jealous and wanted to simply claim Luke as hers publicly. She’d had to do it countless times at events. But, she blamed the hormones now. Lately, she’d been feeling all gross and fuzzy on the inside. All she wanted was to be affectionate towards her husband anyone watching be damned. 

There she vowed no matter the mistakes of Luke’s parents they would not fall into the same pattern. They’d be different and forge a new path. The force itself would not tear them apart.

**Author's Note:**

> This by far is the grossest thing I've ever written. Gross sentimental married couple feelings.


End file.
